My name is Mel, and I want to live in a world where people can connect courageously and love authentically.
I guide social misfits and cultural rebels to experiences of joyful, embodied, authentic, open relationships.
I specialise in working with queer and questioning humans — and the people who love them — who are curious about, or already practicing, consensual non-monogamy, with a focus on Self-Partnership, Solo Polyamory, Relationship Anarchy, and Trauma Informed practices.
My ideal clients are social misfits, cultural rebels, who are seeking support on dating and relating in honest non-monogamous relationship configurations. I work with individuals, rather than couples, but can work with all parties in a relationship individually.
My goal is to empower you to have relationships that are healthy, courageous, and fulfilling.
I compassionately challenge you to examine how old ideas might be holding you back, how fear might be running the show, and I guide you through new skills and perspectives for building radical relationships.
Want to work with me? Read on!
"You’re a gem of a coach... There are so few as well-researched, as curious, as principled, and as grounded as you. Your resources are pure gold."
I've been able to articulate and communicate much better within my relationships and to create safe spaces.
"I felt completely isolated and confused when it came to relationships when I first found Mel for coaching. After only one session, I knew she was a relationship mentor I could trust and wanted to learn more from."
Mel is an incredible listener and her attention to detail was crucial. I walked away with much more than I had anticipated: I came away with a lot of tools to work with, and also a comfortable understanding of who I am and how I present myself to others. Mel is nothing short of awesome at what she does, and I will continue to use her as a resource and recommend her.
Thank you Mel for such an enlightening and helpful workshop! I thoroughly enjoyed all of it and look forward to continued learning from you. So grateful for all these extra resources.
The work you are doing is changing the world in such positive ways, and helping people change their own worlds, both inner and outer.
"It was so good for me to open up and a relief to see that things don't have to be so black and white but within this there is still the possibility of clarity and a more personal, creative and radical approach to relationships... Love what you are offering Mel. You are awesome at what you are doing! It was great for me to be out of my comfort zone and to hear from folks who appeared to be very much in theirs. Thank you!"
"I first took the class in spring 2020. The experience was like a seed planted in the garden that sprouted and continues to sink deeper roots and grow taller, reaching for the sun and remaining an important part of my relationship garden"
~ Paul, Monogamy Detox Course Student
"I desperately knew in my bones there was another script out there for me but when I struggled to find a healthy version of one, I haphazardly began writing it myself. And now?! To come into an entire community of people actively peeling back the veil to reveal their own trauma and vulnerability?? I am over the moon and feel so enthusiastic all the time. It's the first time in the last several years where I have had such sustained joy and direction."
~ Anon Course Student
"Your work has reminded me that perhaps there isn’t anything wrong with me at all. I am amazed at the deep levels of shame we carry as human beings because we don’t fit into the construct that is given to us as a model for our life. It feels exciting because I can now explore what I want for my life rather than be gifted something that just doesn’t feel right for me."
"After the workshop I felt like I could breathe again. I felt like my version of non-monogamy wasn't "wrong" and, even more helpful, my former partners wasn't either. I connected with people thinking of the same things as I was, struggling with the same things, and asking questions like me. I cried. I breathed. And for the first time in my life I didn't feel like a love alien dropped onto this planet."
Listen to my interview on Modern Sex Talks, “Polyamory Done Right”
“What if it truly doesn't matter what you do, but how you do whatever you do?”
~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer